Falling in love over and over again

Ever wondered if you will still be loving the one you are with now forever, or that if you woke up tomorrow morning you would still be feeling the same about them? 

Well, here is how you can fall in love with your partner over and over again. Just because you have been with your partner for a long time it is not a reason enough to start taking them for granted and stop doing special things for them. In fact the more you stay with a person the more special things you should do for them. This is because when you settle into something comfortable for you, something that lacks all the excitement all you will be doing is you will be boring your partner. If you do not want this to happen to you, do something special and exciting with and for your partner.

Show your partner that you appreciate all that they are and what they do. If you keep appreciating someone and not highlighting all their short comings they will love you even more. This is because they will know that you love them for them and you do not expect something more in return but just love and understanding. They will end up falling for your personality. If you are yourself, everyday there will be something new about you, something interesting that your partner would like to explore. This way your partner will be falling in love with the person that is you.

Be flexible and fun to be with, do not be rigid to a point where your partner cannot suggest anything out of the usual and expect you to be happy about it. This is because many people, In fact most people want to have some good company, someone who would make them laugh even when there is nothing to laugh about. Someone who they wont have to make an effort to entertain them but someone who when they are together, they both feel comfortable and fun to be with. That way, you will make your partner fall in love with you again every time you have a conversation and you make them feel great about themselves or something.

Make your partner feel wanted, needed and loved. Involve them in everything you do and make them feel like they are part of you. Tell them you love them and when you need them, make sure you tell them. This way, you will make your fall more and more in love whenever he or she thinks that you love them and that you need them. 

Love is a process and it needs to be natured the correct way of loving people will guarantee that the person falls in love with you all over again but if you go about it the wrong way, love will never survive long. :)

Do you have TRUST issues?

Nobody likes to be fighting with a loved one, but a loss of trust causes serious problems. Trust issues are hard to overcome and often keep popping up. You and your partner must resolve your trust issues if you are to move toward a more healthy relationship.

Talk it out. This seems obvious, but when two people in a relationship talk, it helps if the couple trusts each other. Building trust can be especially hard with someone you're in a relationship with because that person has the power to hurt you. By practicing constant communication and keeping it open and honest, trust can be slowly built, or rebuilt.

Forget the past. Don't hold on to old hurts. Everyone's been hurt, and you need to work through those issues, not hold on to them and shove them in the other person's face. This will only make things worse, and it won't resolve anything. The important thing is to not dwell on the things that happened.

Focus on the present. Don't let your mind think about the bad things that could happen. When you focus on what could be, you're heading down a road that destroys trust. Banish negative thoughts and think about what IS happening, not what could happen.

Take it slowly. Take your relationship day by day and communicate daily as well. Don't expect all of your walls to come crumbling down overnight--it takes work, and time.

Building trust takes time and rebuilding trust takes even longer. Remember, it's a process. :)

On being happy,,,

As we all have likely noticed by now, there is endless information all around us these days dealing with the topic of happiness, and specifically, how to be happy. There is no shortage of books, blog posts,  & documentaries on the subject. 

 It’s naturally a popular subject because it’s the one thing we are all after. And one would think that since there has been this explosion of material dealing with how we should go about achieving happiness, we’d all have it in the bag. 

 But somehow we don’t. 

 We’re still searching. Why is that? I mean it seems pretty simple: happiness is a choice, so choose it. Right?  

Mission accomplished. Think positive thoughts & go forth being happy. It’s all about the attitude, so improve your attitude. Voilà! Happiness is right there. And let’s not forget the importance of Gratitude. 

 Counting your blessings each day is a sure fire way to finding happiness.

It may sound like I am mocking or being sarcastic, but I actually believe all of these things. 

 I just don’t believe they are easy to do. I think these messages are too often delivered in an oversimplified manner and with not enough direction on what it takes to put such shifts in attitude, perspective and behavior into practice. 

 And happiness does inevitably take practice. For some it will require more practice than for others. 

 I learned just recently that people are born with a happiness baseline. How happy and optimistic we naturally are is in our DNA. The good news is, the level of happiness we inherit accounts for only 50% of our total measure of happiness. A good portion of the rest is absolutely up to us, but it will take some work.

:)

when nails grow,,,

When nails grow, we cut the nails not the fingers.
Similarly, when misunderstandings grow, we should cut the misunderstandings not the relationship.

I have loved and I always will
love you,,,

I have to ask because
it bothers me same with what
you will do,,,,

this shouldn't be the end because this is just a
small pebble of what we have gone through,,,

 all I wanted was security,,,,

I have given my everything and willingly still to be there for you

after all that has been through,,,

willing even if I am not the least in your priority,,,

willing even if we come second in your life,,,,

but then I guess you will never
understand my point of view,,,

relationships do not work that way,,,

and if you plan on leaving US again,,,

because of this lame situation,,,

there will never be another because you will be my last.

We love you always bear that in mind.

Friendship,,,what's the real deal?

Friendship is a relationship between two people who hold mutual affection for each other.

Friendships and acquiantancship are thought of as spanning across the same continum.

The study of friendship is included in the fields of sociology, social psychology, anthropology, philosophy and zoology. (WHAT THE HELL?????!!!)

Various academic theories of friendship have been proposed, including social exchange theory, equity theory relational dialects, and attachments styles,,,,ERRRRRRRR??????

The value of friendship is often the result of friends consistently demonstrating the following:

-The tendency to desire what is best for the other
-sympathy  and empathy
-honesty, even in situations where it may be difficult for others to speak the truth
-Mutual understanding and compassion; ability to go to each other for emotional support
-Enjoyment of each other's company
-trust in one another
-Positively strong, deep, close reciprocity, mutuality — equal give-and-take between the two parties
-The ability to be oneself, express one's feelings and make mistakes without fear of judgement.

Friendship has two dimensions.

 The two dimension include: 

quality and conflict. 

The quality of friendship is important for a persons well being and it contributes to the closeness of friends. Within the quality of friendship, it is important to have healthy and interesting interaction. This type of interaction leads to a higher quality of friendship. The second dimension is conflict, which connects with the quality of friendships. High quality friendships have great ways of resolving conflict which ultimately leads to a stronger and healthier relationship.

In this basis, friendships rule in every relationship in this world. May it be from your Parent-Child, Husband-Wife, Boyfriends-Girlfriends and Friends-Friends.

So just enjoy, and nourish the relationship and grow with each other as any conflicts arises sit and talk what other way to do than expressing and pouring out your heart.

:)

when enough is enough,,,,

Lately, I've been approached by a friend who was having relationship troubles, yes she is in a relationship but with uncertainties and just like a sinking sand,,,,she has been sinking all along deep inside,,,without the partner knowing it and that the partner would not open up and would just shush her out.

There are few things more difficult than really taking a close look at our troubled relationship, even if you know it is the right things to do. Many unhealthy relationships go on for far longer than they should for several reasons, none of which usually lead to one or both partners actually finding happiness.

When you feel that something is seriously wrong between you and your partner, the worst possible mistake you can make is to let it go, pretend that nothing is happening. While some minor problems may fade away when left alone, most only become worse over time and those who want a relationship to last may find heartache at the end, despite their hope.

Some of the most common reasons for avoiding ending a relationship have little to do with the dynamic the individuals share and are more often caused by underlying problems, ones that the people involved may not even be aware of:

Fear of Being Alone: Unfortunately, while love may bring a great deal of companionship, the wrong kind can feel lonelier than being single. The desire to have friendship in your life is not a good reason to stay in a romantic relationship and may put too much of a burden on your partner.

Time Invested: Many couples won't even consider logical break up advice even when the relationship has become far more negative than is healthy for either partner simply because they feel that they have invested too much time and effort into making it work. This need to succeed is often seen in those with more competitive natures and while this may serve them well in some aspects of life, it is also important to know when it's time to call it quits.

Scary Out There: Certain individuals will remain in their current, unhappy relationships because the idea of meeting singles and trying to find new love simply terrifies them. The thought of starting a new relationship, in essence starting from scratch, is so frightening that they will overlook their current position, even when it has become dangerous.

Still Have Feelings: Falling in love and maintaining a relationship are often intertwined but not the same thing. Many couples resist the idea of breaking it off because though they may recognize the poor situation they are in, the still care for their partners.

These reasons and many more keep millions of unhappy couples together every day. While certain reasons are understandable to a degree, such as staying together for the sake of children, for the most part it robs one or both partners of a potential happiness and causes a great deal of pain over time.

One of the greatest questions a person who is considering just how bad their relationship might be is this: Are you happy or unhappy most of the time? Whether you need to create a pros and cons list or simply delve through the past year and try to recall your happiest moments, it is important to be able to identify the cause of your negative feelings.

Another truly horrible aspect of a break up is that in many cases one or both partners may still care for each other and may continue to try working on a relationship that has little hope of succeeding. While it certainly may work out in the end of two people love one another enough and are willing to work on how they interact, in many cases this become a long and grueling process, finally resulting in an exhausting end.

In order to avoid some of the worst pitfalls of a bad relationship, it is vital to recognize where the problem areas are and whether or not they may be worked on over time. An example of this might be one partner's continued bad habit over many years. If this habit caused the other partner to feel very negative and they see no sign of improvement over time this may mean that the relationship is not progressing. This lack of effort on one side may also indicate a reluctance to compromise, which is essential to any strong, healthy relationship.

Looking toward the future may not include seeking out new people right away and those who feel frightened by the prospect of being alone should take comfort in the time they will have to better understand themselves. In time, if a person feels healed and ready there are an abundance of ways to meet people. 

Some may choose to become more active in their community and find other with common interests. Others may choose to find love online where they can select from groups of people who are more likely to suit their needs. However the path is chosen, there are plenty of opportunities to begin again if you should so desire and a better chance of happiness awaiting you than the current relationship which has become more of a burden than a blessing.

Remember that in order to secure your chance at happiness; you must be able to move away from the things which would destroy it. Though it may take reserves of courage you did not know you had, if it is time to say goodbye to a relationship that has little or no chance of making you happy, the right thing to do is to strive for something that will.

:)

when is LOVE complicated?

For real, is it really that complicated? or is it because of people making it more complicated? love gives out extremes emotions that really depends if it is going to be happy or heart break.

But on the other side, people have their own set of thinking. That's why even if you become a "psychic" or just a plain mind-reader, there are no uncertainties. Change comes in, in the nick of time.

Love is so complicated, there are no reasons or explanations why do you love the person. It is much more felt using the heart than the mind. There could be answers, but it is not sure or not even a concrete answer you will find. This could not even be answered even if man seeks for it, looking and looking for answers. A pretty face? kindness? security? what more?

Love is so complicated that no amount of material things that could compare your feelings to that person. You may have roses, chocolates or even a DVD of  her favorite movie. But the question is, does it please her? with things like that? will she love you back?. Others may fall just by the mere greeting of "good morning" may it be text, chat or a phone call or even in person. Some just a mere greeting falls inlove.

Love is so complicated, time has it's own difference. somtimes you are both ok with it at times, not. One moment you're sweet and the next thing there's you are like strangers in the night. It's but natural. Part of life. There are no permanent things in this world.

Love is so complicated when small things, becomes big. You may think, you won't be jealous of his friends who are so close to him even with the looks of the feet flirting back at him. He merely just said "hi" and some may even have argued about it. The simplest things, can heat up. And the simple misunderstanding can lead to complications.

Love is so complicated that you dreaming  of FOREVER, just vanquished in the dark, just like a bubble. In one snap, it just vanished like NEVER-MORE. Because this is just it. the product of  romantic relationship can lead into two things : Never-ending like "till death do us part" and Uncertainties if it is going to last. Is there a difference? there is a fact that as long as the feeling is still there and respect for each other you will really be together in for a good ride.

But how about married couples? even if romance is gone they are still together? they made a promise to each other. That is why it is called marriage, but romance can really fade. What's left is friendship. But it grows deep with  understanding and respect. Because they know each other that well and foundation of thier love for each other is because of friendship.

Love is so complicated that when friends slap you the answer to your problem about your girl/ guy. Yes, still it seems blurry not until he /she tells you. It may be that the signs are already present that he is not interested in you anymore. It may be your friends have given you a thousands a shore of advices telling you to STOP. But not until he tells you himself, you won't wake up. Not until you hear the word STOP or like IT'S OVER,  you still hold on. does it make you stupid? and even if how many times you seek advice to Papa Jack or Joe d' Mango (both are famous LOVE radio advisers in the Philippines) and still you cannot do it? then what's the use of the advice? What for? as always nothing.

Love is so complicated that the word  MOVE-ON is so hard to mention. Specially if you really are not sure. Because you'll never know you might bump into each other and might want to patch things up. There is a saying PAST IS PAST you cannot bring it back anymore. But on the contrary "Love is sweeter the second time around " .Really depends on how many chances you are willing to give. Zero-tolerance might come into place, pity you or maybe stupid you.

And even if how many times you read this blog for how many times and even other articles about complications in love, for sure you would not understand it, specially if you are in that kind of state. It's unruly. That's why it is complicated.